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 Post subject: Re: You're Fired.
PostPosted: Sat Aug 21, 2010 5:29 am 
Dr. Phil

Joined: Sun Feb 24, 2008 4:15 pm
Posts: 212
Nothing is wrong with pain and discomfort. It's just more encouraging (to everyone reading this, not just Steve) to know that you intended it to come into your life for you to grow, rather than just as life giving you a shit sandwich.

That being the case, there are a few good things about feeling good too. There are some people who go through their lives avoiding pain at all costs, while there are others who believe that the only way to grow, or be tough, or be a man is to go through a lot of pain and discomfort. Both are limited ways of thinking and both end in living through a lot of pain.

If you want to grow and learn about yourself and develop while still taking it easy, you need a lot of courage. That's the price. One thing I have found with both myself and everyone I have worked on, is that when they are about to go through a hard time, they get at least one warning just before. So if they are in a relationship which is about to break up or something, they will get a warning that their partner is not happy or something like that just before. If they are about to lose their job, they will get an incident where they get busted by the boss, or something to let them know to change something.

Where it takes courage is to see at the point they get the warning, they need to admit where they could improve and work on it. If they admit it and work on it at that point, they won't have to have the situation they don't like. But what happens is they don't want to admit it at that point, and blame the boss, or their partner, or life, etc, and so then the inevitable result follows, and they are in pain. If they had the courage to see and admit where they could improve at the time they got the warning, they could have learnt about themselves and grown without pain and discomfort.

It might not sound like courage, yet I have not seen many people who can do this. The ones that do end up having the lives other people envy where they just go from strength to strength without a lot of the 'cross before the crown' events happening.

As far as learning about yourself. It seems weird but at the bottom of everything people want to avoid learning and knowing about themselves at all costs. So it takes courage to go forward with that resistance and still learn about yourself and know about yourself. Because people don't want to do that, they manifest pain in their lives until learning the lesson is easier than going through the situation. The more courage they have to learn about themselves, the less pain and discomfort they need to go through before they choose to learn the lesson. It is always a choice.

Of course, going the other way and trying to avoid pain and discomfort is even more disempowering. No need to go into that. It is about letting go of the fear and the judgement of pain, but also letting go of the need for it.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Aug 21, 2010 9:17 am 
Mostly A Man. Mostly.

Joined: Sun Feb 24, 2008 4:51 pm
Posts: 5642
Location: Coogee Bay.
Cool mate. Just wanted to make sure you weren't advocating running away from pain or discomfort.


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 Post subject: Re:
PostPosted: Mon Aug 23, 2010 2:35 pm 
Mostly A Gimp. Mostly.
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Joined: Tue Sep 11, 2007 1:30 am
Posts: 1023
Location: Potts Point.
Anton wrote:
I think my point was misunderstood. I believe the source of all happiness and fulfilment is perspective. Whether menial or serious task, your persective is what will give you ultimate satisfaction and fulfillment. I was only asking if this experience is a recurring phenomenon, maybe the universe is trying to steer you in a new direction which is outside your current line of sight. There are many ways to view this experience and recently i have be moving against the flow of life with my work. I have been struggling to generate an experiential festival over a period of 1 1/2 years and i changed my perspective that this lesson was to be learnt at another time. I returned to construction work and since my whole life has been turned inside out for the better.

Anyway, there are many opportunities available to you and you can create anything you like. In my experience, how you get there is another story!

I see what you're saying, Anton. Maybe universe is steering me elsewhere. I know for certain that hospitality is not going to be my career.

But I'm also very clear that my lack of success in hospitality is my own doing, and that at the source of this unsuccess is, as you say, the perspective I have around it. And that this perspective is something I'd probably bring to another job, which would lead me to undermine my own success there.

Hence this thread, really.

The inspiration for this thread has been a search for a perspective which give me the energy and the drive to excel in hospitality, and really - in any job. Wouldn't it be wonderful if any job could be made exciting and engaging. just by a shift in perspective around it?



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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Sep 25, 2010 8:07 pm 
Get Real Graduate

Joined: Wed May 14, 2008 12:55 am
Posts: 484
hey Steven

I was thinking about my life and how I am successful in some areas of it but not so successful in others, with success being defined as meeting my personal objectives.

When I looked honestly at the areas where I was coming up short, it became clear that I wasn't really applying myself to the same level in the areas I was doing ok.

Thinking about it, it seems like I was scared of really committing myself to them, because I was afraid I wouldn't reach the level of success I had set for myself. Rather than trying & failing, it was easier just to flit around the edges making token efforts here & there, never really stepping up and putting myself on the line.

Last night I swallowed my pride (no swallow jokes please), accepted I was starting from square one, like a child who knows nothing, and began a new approach.

From the outside, you do seem to be very successful in terms of woman and with what you & logun have created with AI. So you obviously have the capacity to do it, I wonder if there is something holding you back?

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