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Board index : THE LOUNGE : The Icing On Top.

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 01, 2010 1:26 am 
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Fresh Fish

Joined: Wed Jun 30, 2010 5:02 am
Posts: 28
Have you all ever heard of the uncanny valley? Say you make a robot 95% like a human. That's really cool! You've done a hell of great job engineering this robot, and she's a marvel of technology, just a wicked sweet robot. Say you make a robot 99% like a human. That's even cooler! It's just amazing everything that this robot can do. But then you make her 99.9% like a human. You can hardly tell the difference anymore. You start to think of her as human, and begin to treat her as such. Then you look into her eyes. They're an amazing piece of technology; you've used cutting edge techniques to make her eye movements smooth and human like. But you look into them, and they are dead; there is something very, very wrong, and it creeps you out. You realize that just beneath the surface, there's not blood or flesh, but a million whirring gears. And you've crossed into the uncanny valley, where she is no longer an outstanding robot, but a very creepy and disturbing human being.
I think that in pickup, I think one of two things happens; either your effort to be something that you're not becomes immediately apparent, or 'succeed' and fall into an uncanny valley, where you're almost there, and she can't quite put her finger on it but there's something just not right about you. If she's drunk, she might be able to overcome this for one night, but it is certainly a far cry from love. You fall into the fallacy of thinking that just by imitating someone else, but not really being them, you can become them. And being something that you're not just feels like shit. For me, it's one of the worst feelings in the world.


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 02, 2010 11:16 am 
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Dr. Phil

Joined: Wed Jun 09, 2010 10:42 am
Posts: 234
nice metaphor.
This article cuts the topic a bit
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Qualia
Qualia describes the "subjective quality of conscious experience". Or one could simply say the feeling or rather the state someone is in. A woman will feel if you enjoy being around her and totally let go or if you think about stuff like patterns or mirroring. You feel a certain way and it tints your behaviour and the atmosphere you radiate.


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 17, 2010 9:20 pm 
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Fresh Fish

Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2010 8:34 pm
Posts: 18
Great post! This is almost a spiritual exercise of trust and being vulnerable. Knowing where your going and allowing the journey to unfold naturally. This is power, having routines etc is a type of force. I went to 1 event after discovering "The Community" and was shocked to find so many Geeks. Don;t get me wrong, i like Geeks, yet at the event my experience was someone found the mathematical formula to get laid. There is no creativity, no real pushing of boundaries, no expression. Only Impression.

This process is a building of energy. It is memorable, unique and requires both parties to participate with awareness. Only a true Alpha Male can use these techniques.


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 21, 2010 4:26 pm 
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Get Real Graduate

Joined: Mon Jun 28, 2010 11:32 pm
Posts: 111
Qualifying women, peacocking, and geekiness

Well, one thing that happens with geeks(such as me) is that years of failure keeps reinforcing that there's something wrong with us. And we keep trying to find a mechanical solution. Doesn't have to be science geeks- can be any awkward individual.

Let me state my case(and this is probably similar for many 'geeks', let me know if it is):

I for one, did have strongly defined criteria for women; I used to qualify them heavily. But at the same time, I now realise that I was going overboard peacocking, showing that I was smart/open-minded/rational etc(thus coming across as very geeky, trying to sell myself).

But when qualification didn't work, and I remained celibate, desperation set in. I stopped qualifying. I suppose most people can easily pick on that vibe- 'desperation'.
This is when I started looking for a formula- thus falling into uncanny valley.

I guess I'll have to get back to qualifying women- without peacocking too much. If they want to find out about me... the onus is on them. As my 13 year old brother told me, "don't show off too much".

Now, I had similar advice regarding qualification before from a friend who dug into attraction institute material(I don't know his nick).

I misinterpreted it- I thought I could dress as shabbily as I wanted and it wouldn't matter as long as I qualified women.

The guy who writes succeedsocially.com states- people are lazy. They often let first impressions govern them. Dress well.
Put this together with LoGun's "purpose", and I ask myself: Yes, my purpose is to be myself, a carefree researcher... But does that include coming across as a hobo to every other person I meet?

No.

So a bit of peacocking is probably essential to fit in seamlessly with society. Maybe stand out in a positive way. A strong Personality appears to negate or even positively enhance a foreign accent/look from a stigmatised background.

But there seems to be not much of a substitute for that first visual impression drawn from style/dress.

Now, I'm still in the process of changing/learning, but from a geek's point of view, I guess the change I'm going to be making is going from looking for a readymade solution to getting back to qualifying women, at the same time not trying to overdo the peacocking(which is a sign of geekiness), just restricting myself to the basic conformational codes(good dress sense).

I haven't yet fully defined my purpose, I'll have to get there.

Any geeks reading who I might have struck a chord with?


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 15, 2011 2:11 am 
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Fresh Fish

Joined: Sun Jul 10, 2011 1:38 am
Posts: 38
Thank Logun
This helped me a lot and your articles
Thanks man


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 04, 2012 10:33 pm 
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Get Real Graduate

Joined: Mon May 14, 2012 11:18 am
Posts: 58
This is genius.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 04, 2012 11:12 pm 
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Mostly A Man. Mostly.

Joined: Sun Feb 24, 2008 4:51 pm
Posts: 5642
Location: Coogee Bay.
It's true. I'm a genius.


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 09, 2012 8:53 pm 
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Dr. Phil

Joined: Wed Jun 09, 2010 10:42 am
Posts: 234
A humble one on top of that :D


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PostPosted: Sun Dec 23, 2012 4:49 pm 
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Get Real Graduate

Joined: Thu Dec 06, 2012 5:55 pm
Posts: 46
"Guys who are naturally good with women spend their time trying to find women they're interested in rather than trying to find women who are interested in them."

I wish someone had told me this years ago (they probably did, and I wasnt listening or understand it). But im glad im hearing this now!!

Cheers Leigh, your a legend!


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 24, 2012 11:14 am 
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Mostly A Man. Mostly.

Joined: Sun Feb 24, 2008 4:51 pm
Posts: 5642
Location: Coogee Bay.
Great to hear it's finally sunk in. Now, you get out there and find them! :-)


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